Leaders Must Lead: The Three "F's" of Leadership

There comes a point in every relationship, organization, business, and related activity when leaders must lead. The various teams have done their designing. The committees have reviewed it. Management has approved it. Now, it is time for leaders to take control and execute it. This is true whether we are talking about building a rocket ship or selling a house; once plans are made they have to be executed.

Leaders are the people that make it happen. They execute the plans and insure the goals are met. Whether they are leaders of a large group of fellow associates or they are an individual performance leader, such as sales leader, they set the pace and standards of the job to be done.

Leaders accomplish this through other people. A team leader will guide and direct his team insuring all the members maintain their focus on achieving the desired results. A sales leader will work with all parties of a transaction to insure they stay focused on making the transaction. The primary function of leadership in any situation involves working with and through other people to achieve the results of the goal.

Working with and through other people can be challenging but that is why you are the leader. As a leader it is important to learn and apply the three F’s of leadership in all their work relationships and interactions with other people. A leader should treat everyone with respect by being:

1. Fair

2. Firm

3. Frank

Fair

Your reputation is one of the most important assets you have. How people perceive you will determine how willing they are to work with you. As a team leader a positive reputation will make your associates put out the extra effort needed to accomplish any goal. As a sales leader your reputation will bring business and clients to you.

Being fair is simply treating all people the same. If people know they can trust you they will want to work with you. Be honest with all parties and work for a win-win solution to any problems that arise.

Make time for all your associates and business partners. This will go a long way to helping you achieve the reputation of being fair. Showing favoritism in any business relationship can have strong negative consequences.

Even in businesses where professional and corporate guidelines/rules appear to restrict your relationship with one party or the other in a business transaction you can still be fair in your actions. Be honest. If you cannot do something tell the party you cannot. By following the guidelines to the letter you are maintaining your fairness in the business relationship. Simply applying the rules equally to all parties with fairness and honesty helps you achieve your goals.

Firm

In the old days when you said a leader was firm you meant he ruled with an iron fist. There are still times when a leader has to be strict but being firm means more than this. It means being a decisive leader, one who can make a decision and follow through with it.

When being firm you need to stick to your principles and company policies/rules in all your business relationships. Don’t be indecisive when it comes to doing what is right or wrong. Let your principles and policies guide you in your decisions and how you implement actions.

When you make a decision stick with it, don’t be wishy-washy about it. You are not a “yes person” but you are the leader and at times it is your job to make the hard choices that are necessary to accomplish the goal.

Being firm also means when your decision or plans need to be changed you change them. But, you base the need to change on the facts needed to reach your goal. A good leader knows when and how to be flexible and adaptable.

Be open the suggestion, ideas, guidance and advice. A good leader does not make decisions in a vacuum but in the end a good leader makes the decision.

Frank

A good leader is an honest leader. His very principles demand truthfulness and honesty. He shares all the facts that he can with his team and/or clients to help them accomplish the goal.

When working in a team environment a good leader deals with all situations with truthfulness whether with the team or an individual. If praise is justified he gives it honestly and freely. If correction is needed he handles it with the same frankness, dealing with facts.

An individual leader such as a sales leader is frank with his associates and clients. He gives them all the facts, both good and bad, so they can make the best decision for their goals.

By following the three “F’s” of leadership a good leader will find the interaction with fellow associates and clients easier and more rewarding. Developing a reputation of being fair, firm and frank in your business relationships will help move you from being a good leader to being a great leader.

Dressing for a job Interview - What Not to Do

Go to a job interview with me wearing pants hanging around your knees or a dress and/or blouse that barely covers you; I will not hire you. Yes, I will give you a cursory interview, but you will not get the job. Call me old fashion or even prejudice if you like, but I believe there is a level of business decorum and respect that needs to be maintained in a work place no matter what the level or position. The interview is a way for you to demonstrate your professionalism. For more info get your copy of: How to Find a Job by Larry B. Gray.

 

 

Click here to order your copy of How to Find a Job today from Amazon.

56 SKIDMORE RD, WINTER HAVEN, FL 33884 $ $650,000 www.saragray.ismyreagent.com MLS#L4641774

Check out this great listing and then call Sara Jane Gray at 863-232-2987 to schedule an appointment to see this fantastic opportunity in Winter Haven, Florida.

56 SKIDMORE RD, WINTER HAVEN, FL 33884 $ $650,000 www.saragray.ismyreagent.com MLS#L4641774

Highlights of Proposed Foreclosure Laws in Florida

Join me today in welcoming Sarah Parr as our guest blogger for today.

Highlights of Proposed Foreclosure Laws in Florida

By Sarah Parr

Florida has seen its share of hardships because of the housing crisis. Analysts say we’re experiencing a slow recovery, but the aftermath of the housing crisis still lingers, especially here. The Sunshine State recently witnessed a 3.11 percent increase in foreclosure activity, according to RealtyTRAC’s year-end report. Lawmakers, real estate professionals and consumer advocates want to change Florida’s status and reform its foreclosure process.  Lawmakers are currently talking about implementing various measures, and this has spurred debate between people from all sides of the issue. The proposed laws could considerably alter the way foreclosures are handled in Florida.

Curing Florida’s long judicial process

House Bill 87 intends to speed up Florida’s long judicial-foreclosure process. Supporters claim that the bill looks after borrowers by requiring banks and lenders to show they own a mortgage before they can file any foreclosure action. If set into law, the bill would also allow third-party lien holders, such as condo or homeowner associations, to push foreclosures through a faster process rather than through the customary court arrangement. House Bill 87 would give borrowers 20 days to provide defense against the foreclosure action. After a final judgment in foreclosure is reached, the bill would give banks and lenders one year instead of the present five years to go after borrowers for losses from a foreclosure.

House Bill 87 The legislation has created the most discussion out of all the proposed legislation, as Pine Hills foreclosure attorneys might tell you. Opponents of the bill claim it would rather pump out foreclosures as quickly as possible, instead of protecting the rights of homeowners. They also claim that 20 days is not enough time for homeowners to seek out attorneys for foreclosure defense or to provide their own reasonable defenses. On the other hand, supporters assert the foreclosure process is long-drawn-out, producing gloom for everyone involved. Proponents say accelerating the foreclosure process would also be favorable for Florida real estate’s future success, as homes in foreclosure limbo can be eyesores that bring surrounding property values down.

Pushing through case backlog

Under Senate Bill 1666, senior justices or judges would be able to consent to temporary duty to help with the buildup of foreclosure cases in Florida. The bill would also allow second publication of the notice of sale of a home to be published online in lieu of publication in any other form of media.  This changes the requirement that a second notice of pending foreclosure must occur in a print media advertisement, a move some say is unfair to low-income homeowners and seniors who could only find out about a looming foreclosure sale through a newspaper notice.

Protection for homeowners in distress

Four bills, proposed and sponsored by Senator Darren Soto (D-Orlando), seek to aid homeowners struggling with foreclosure or mortgage issues. Senate Bills 1226 and 371 would mandate that lenders can only file a deficiency judgment one year after a final foreclosure judgment, and would only have two years to collect any outstanding debt. Right now, residents can be contacted by debt collectors for up to two decades. Senate Bill 1236, also known as the “Mortgage Principal Reduction Act,” would require the Florida Housing Finance Corporation to utilize $100 million of the federal government’s Hardest-Hit Program to start a mortgage principal reduction program for Floridians with properties in foreclosure. The final proposed bill by Soto, the “Short Sale Debt Relief Act,” would make deficiency judgments unenforceable on a short sale if the original debt was 20 percent or greater than fair market value.

Based on all of the proposals presented, Florida will probably see significant changes in its foreclosure process soon.

 

 

Sarah Parr is an Orlando-based writer who blogs about issues pertaining to foreclosure.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Interview by Author Roy Murry

I was recently interviewed by Author Roy Murry on his website, "Murry Reviews and Interviews." I know it is just my over-inflated ego but I did like the lead-in he posted on social media, "Larry B. Gray, author, reviewer, business innovator, and blogger is interviewed on Connie’s Brother’s Blog."

Be sure to check out the article and all the other great reviews and interviews on Roy's site. Just click on the link below.

Thanks Roy, for all your support.




Click here to read the full interview by Author Roy Murray.

Poker, Panty Raids and Anti-War Marches

Another snippet from "A Boy From Down East"

Poker, Panty Raids and Anti-War Marches

What in the world could these three activities have in common?  As I settled into the routine of dorm life at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill these became part of the unofficial schedule of events and entertainment.  Each of these events shared a common connector which helped build friendships and enlightened my college experience.

There were five of us who lived next door to each other on the first floor of Graham Dorm.  Since we did not partake of the “evil weed,” alcohol became the libation of choice.  Beer was our favorite but because we were each too poor to buy it on a regular basis, it was reserved for special occasions.  Our fallback drink became wine, Boones Farm Strawberry Hill to be specific.  Occasionally someone bought a bottle of Apple and we all scolded him for not paying attention.

Every Friday night was poker night for any of us who were staying on campus for the weekend.  We met in one of our rooms and set up a card table and played well into the night.  Since we were all card sharks and big time wheeler dealers we had to set a bet limit to 1¢.  If we didn’t, the game would be over after a couple of hands. 

One of the rules of play was the bottle rule.  We played until someone won enough hands to be $1.oo ahead.  At this point we took a break from cards and walked up to the little convenience store located on Franklin Street to buy a bottle of Boones Farm for 99¢.  We returned to the game and played until the next dollar was won.

This usually continued until one of three things occurred. First, everyone ran out of money. Since we were college students we had very little money and we were smart enough not to bring all we had to the table. This typically occurred around 1:00 AM.

The second game-ending occurrence was the closing of the little store.  This normally occurred at 1:00 AM.  Allowing for an additional hour to finish off that last bottle of Strawberry Hill we wrapped up the game by 2:00 AM.

The third reason to stop the game rarely occurred but it took a devastating toll on any plans you had for Saturday.  It occurred when the games were played too fast and $1.00 winners happened too often.  This lead to a condition where no one was able to walk to the little store and no one else cared.

Ah, Friday night poker was fun.

Another periodic occurrence that happened several times each semester was the infamous “panty raid.” Usually between 9:30 PM and 10:30 PM a loud clatter of noise arose out on the quad. Guys from the other male dorms on the north campus crossed our quad of 5 male dorms yelling that immortal call to arms, “Panty Raid,” as they marched to Cobb Hall which was an all-female dorm in 1972. By the time they reached Cobb there would be close to 1,000 people in the group. 

Whether it was Cobb Hall or one of the other female dorms of the north campus the event played out same. Forget any preconceived ideas or anything you might have seen in a movie about panty raids.

As the crowd began to arrive at the girl’s dorm several campus police vehicles would drive up and park across the street.  Usually three of the largest policemen walked over and one stood in front of each door.  The one at the main entrance would knock on the door and tell the house mother to lock all the doors and first floor windows.  The rest of the police sat on their vehicles and watched the show.

The crowd of guys gathered across the front of the building and began chanting “Panties, Panties.” I know it sounds corny, but no one said guys were smart when animal instincts took over.  The girls gathered at the windows of the upper floors looking out and laughing.  Every so often one would throw a pair of panties out the window and the crowd went crazy. It was like a shark feeding frenzy.  Looking back I realize this stage of the event was similar to chumming the water when you go fishing.

After the crowd was worked up by the occasional panty, the girls moved to the next and most exciting part of the show.  A girl would lean out of the window and dangle a pair of panties teasing the crowd and getting everyone to bunch up in a tight group.  When the timing was just right the girl with the panties suddenly pulled back into the window very quickly.  Before the group below her window could react, four arms came out with a trashcan full of cold water which was dumped onto the group of guys standing directly below.

This process was repeated several times until the crowd got bored and quietly dispersed. 
All you could hear as we were leaving was the cat calls and laughing from the dorm and the laughing from the campus police.

As for me and my friends, we only had to see the bait and switch occur once. We were smart enough to stay in the back and avoid the soaking which was sure to come.  We stood there and laughed while we shared our bottle of Strawberry Hill, which one of us always had stashed.

The final activity was the anti-war marches of that time.  In 1972 the Vietnam War was still going on and the anti-war sentiment was very strong on college campuses across the country. UNC was no exception.  By the spring of 1972 the lottery for the draft had occurred and with my draft number I knew I did not have to worry.  In many ways I was very apathetic about the war and to be honest viewed the opportunity to march as another fun thing to do.  And, as I look back most in the crowd felt the same way.

There were two big opportunities I had to participate in anti-war demonstrations that spring.  The first was a big demonstration to be held in Washington, DC.  The activists had put up flyers around campus about the Washington march indicating that UNC organizers were chartering buses to take students to DC to participate.  For $50.oo you got a bus ride and chance to see the nation’s capital, which I had never done.  This was a great opportunity.

I went back to the dorm, called Dad and asked if he could put $50.oo into my account.  I explained I had an opportunity to take a bus excursion to Washington DC and see the sights.  He thought for that price this sounded like a great opportunity to learn about the nation’s capital.  He told me he would get the money together and let me know when it was in my account.

I not sure how but he found out this was a trip to Washington to demonstrate against the war.  When he called me back he didn’t need to use the phone because he was yelling so loud I could have heard him all the way from Aurora.  He proceeded to let me know that if I went on that trip he would pull me out of school so fast I would not know what hit me.  Needless to say I did not get the money nor did I get to go to Washington.

Later, I did participate in a large demonstration held on the campus.  On that particular day my friends and I were out sunning in the quad when we heard and saw a large crowd of people marching by on Raleigh Street. We decided this looked like fun and followed the group, after we grabbed a couple of bottles of Strawberry Hill.  We marched up Raleigh Street, then down Franklin Street and back south on Columbia St. During the entire trip and later as we assembled on the quad in front of South Building there was a constant chant of “1, 2, 3, 4 we don’t want your F---ing War.” 

After the march and while everyone was standing in front of South Building one speaker after another got up in front of the crowd and ranted about the war.  The true activists stood in front and cheered them on. 

To the rest of us it was just another party.  It wasn't long before this cloud of “funny” smelling smoke began to fill the air and the party began.  As for me and my friends out came the Boones Farm and we joined in.

As you have probably figured out Boones Farm played an integral part in making each of these events a memorable college experience.

 
This too was part of growing up in Aurora NC.

I Lost a Friend Today

I Lost a Friend Today

 

I found out today one of my oldest friends died. Henry (Hank) B. Bland was born on July 25, 1953 and died on November 27, 2012 after battling cancer and several other illnesses throughout his life.

Hank was possibly my oldest friend. I cannot remember a time we were not friends growing up in Edward, NC. In some of the pictures I have of us together we were only 3 years old.

Most of our early years were spent living across the street from each other and we spent many hours at the others home. The Bland home in Edward was one of the first places I where I was allowed to go alone. We spent most days playing together and exploring our world.

We had our own little gang which included Hank, Billy, Al and I. Edward was a very small town and we were it. We played together, went to church together, and rode the bus to school together. We had lots of adventures together.

One of those adventures occurred after church one night. As I said Edward is a very small town with only a couple of streets. We lived on the main street through town and the church was on the back street. Between our house and the church was a small wooded area with a path through it maybe a 100 yards long. I remember going to church with my friends, Al, Hank and Billy and one of them suggesting that we walk home through the path in the woods. It was like a badge of courage we were each trying to earn and this would be the first time we attempted it. I am not sure about the other guys but that 100 yard walk was on the longest walks I have ever taken. That should have been a short distance, but it seemed to go on forever. The woods were darker than on any moonless night. It was quite, not even the wind was blowing. After walking for what seemed like hours without saying a word between us, we finally made it to the other end near Al’s house. It was like the moon come out and the stars were shinning and we started laughing and teasing one another. From that night on we always took the short cut through the woods, I guess we earned our badge.

At first my friends and I only played at each other’s houses, but as we got older and braver we ventured out into the area. Behind Hank’s house was an old abandoned barn. This soon became our clubhouse and our base of operations from which we explored deeper and deeper into the woods.  Finally around age 1o or 11 we began exploring the creek and for the next couple of years Hank and I had many great adventures along the banks of Durham Creek.

Hank and I started school together in the fall of 1959 at Aurora High School and for the next 12 years we went to the same school building. I remember how it was so great riding the school bus with the big kids and we felt grown up. We were lucky that there were a couple of “High School” girls who kept an eye on us. Thanks Miriam and Deanna, Hank’s sister.

 

One Christmas day Hank’s sister Deanna took us to the movies in Washington at the Turnage Theater. The movie Swiss Family Robinson had just come out and we got to see it that first week.

Hank was part of the group that went with me to be on the Romper Room TV show in Greenville, NC on WNCT. We both worked hard back then to be good Do Bees.

After high school I got married and moved to Florida and only saw Hank a few times. He came to Florida for a visit once and we talked for a long while about old times. On several occasions I saw Hank when I went back to North Carolina for a visit, but these times became rarer and rarer.

Even though we had grown apart, separated by time and distance, it is hard to lose an old friend of almost 60 years. I will miss Hank and the world has changed now that he is gone. I know he suffered many illnesses in his adult life but I also can rest assured he is resting peacefully now in the arms of God.

A joy I have today thinking about Hank is all the great times and memories we had together. He was and still is a great friend.

 

This too is part of growing up in Aurora, NC.